Eternal Sleep

 

There is a humble bumble asleep in one of the cosmos flowers. In a lovely pink one, the little creature rests on a petal. Or, at least it is what we thought. Three days later, the now named corpse is still there laying in silence. Untouched by the early morning mist, the light wind blowing, part of the bee must be glued on or somehow the flower, the pink cosmos is clinging to the bee’s remains as an afterthought, a tribute to a job well done in the fading days of summer.

It is appropriate the bee has spent its final moments on this beautiful flower with the symbolism of tranquility, peace, innocence, and love. Having picked a pink flower to rest in, enabled this little one to be in universal harmony.  I think it is lovely. Unfortunately, I don’t think I am going to find a large enough flower petal or petals to rest in to drift off into an eternal sleep. I am okay with the idea. Maybe some flowers in the room if I am aware before passing too far to the point of no return. Who knows in thirty years.

I went through a stage of wanting to rid my house and home of excess clutter and things. What I really needed was not to focus on anything. Our son will have to organize the party of getting stuff hauled away. I will be beyond caring. I do think of my beloved husband and hope he will not be the one dealing with the memories sacred only to me. As time passes, less and less is as valuable to me as simply breathing in and out and being aware of it. Miracles, I am surrounded by miracles.

I have taken up a new habit which does not have anything to do with breathing, meditation, or any other possible idea I have in order to involve myself to evolve, to grow, or become.  I am wearing a different pair of earrings each day. I feel a bit flirty. I like the swing of the long ones when I turn my head.  The man, my husband, asked me if the extra long wires of one pair poked me.  I told him they would if I napped in them. He would know this if he wore any. 

Being retired, I no longer dress for work, you know, a special haircut, earrings, a new blouse because it is fun to share with friends and co-workers. I decided I missed my earrings. I miss messing with my hair, braiding part of it with the rest loose and hanging.  So as part of my day, I think about what pair of earrings to wear. I will admit it will probably not be a daily thing.  As I sit here typing, I realized I had forgotten to select a pair for the day.  I got involved in chopping vegetables, figuring out what next to put in the soup pot, snacking on fresh ripe plums, nibbling on crisp bell peppers, and sipping a cup of tea as it cooled. I was busy. Almost as busy as our little friend, the bumble bee in the cosmos flower before the end. I am thinking of getting up and going to look for a pair of earrings to finished off the day but then there is the dishwasher to unload, I should probably wash the soup kettle, make another cup of tea and snack on the fresh wild blackberries a friend bought me.

Living my life is catching up with me. I could take a nap and then wait for the miracle of waking up.