Sunday, February 22, 2015

When the Wind Blows, the Fence Comes Down



When the Wind Blows, the Fence Comes Down

            You can look and look at something in your life daily and not really see any changes, any meaning or growth then bam an event happens that either gets your attention or you shrug it off.  I am happy without big calamities in our lives.  Both my husband and I like calm and quiet in our life.  Our great adventure today was going to the beach for our daily walk.  We haven’t been on the beach for over a year and while this may sound tragic to some people since we only live five minutes away but we did not move here to be going to the beach a lot.  We moved here because I was pregnant with our son, my husband did not have a job and his mom and dad thought that moving into their house was a good idea all around until the baby was here and their son had a job.  Needlessly to say, we have never moved away from the coast.  We have put down roots we bought a house and after many years of working at various jobs we now have permanent jobs with retirement benefits.  Sounds good, doesn’t it?
            Ah, but it is on days like we are having today with sunshine, a warm temperature and no wind on a February day that causes small undefined events to happen in my heart, my mind and soul.  I long for the days when I can get up in the morning when my body awakens from its slumber in a leisurely manner and after taking time for petting the cat who believes that a great deal of attention is warranted after a night of deprivation, helping myself to a nice cup of green tea, a bit of time reading while sipping my tea with a walk added in after some consideration of whether or not the page turning can be interrupted by such a foolish notion as preparing something to eat before heading out the door.
            My husband is currently in rehearsal for another play and I have to admit despite the great comfort I received from his presence in the house, I am still somewhat happy to see him head out the door to do something other than catering to my needs, desires and projects.  I am trying to broaden my horizons, putting together a new puzzle, working on learning how to do crossword puzzle (I pick up a book on the easiest crossword puzzles for beginners, I am pleased to announce that I am smarter that I thought I was in working on the puzzles, I just wish that I had more time). 
            Really, it all comes down to time.  When you work at an eight to five job, your morning is quite busy with paying attention to the alarm clock (mine sleeps under a heavy towel, the tick, ticking annoys me).  After the clock’s alarm rings, it is a routine of checking to see if we can go walking for our daily mile walk depending on the weather until returning home for my morning tonic drink of hot lemon water, honey, cayenne pepper, ginger and turmeric.  My husband starts running water for doing the dishes, making his tea while I peel the banana, orange to begin our breakfast.  I won’t bore you with the rest of making breakfast, taking our baths, and getting dressed just be assured that somehow we make it out the door to work. 
            In between all of this routine, is the reading of the many books that I have placed on the dining room table as well as my tablet with a kindle book on it.  It seems that it is the only time that I get to read in a day is at mealtime.  Five minutes here and there with lots of regrets as I head out the door to work leaving various characters to rest on the unturned pages until I returned.  Ah, being retired is somewhat wasted on the older generation and the young, well, so many now have their eyes glued to their cell phones, texting as they walk down the streets, listening to I-pods without realizing that the trees that they passing are waking up with new buds on their bare branches or the simple beauty of white clouds passing in the sky.  I have my doubts that they read or have any deep philosophical thoughts.   
            I realized that I was part of the group that was ignoring the magic of what was happening around me when we were walking on the beach this lovely February morning.  I was caught up in worrying about sneaker waves coming in through the tide was heading out, my husband reassured me about the tide before we got on the sandy beach.  I was timid on climbing on the rocks as I watched the waves partially surrounded us.   On the return walk back to the car, I found myself relaxing more and more as I breathe the salty tinged air of ocean spray.  I was lulled by the waves coming onto the shore.   They bought memories of growing up on the main Salmon river in Idaho where the rush of water was constant, tumbling loudly in the spring when swollen with the run off of melting snow, twisting and turning along the banks in the summer with a slowness that comes with a river that had been partially drained off for irrigation of the various farmers’ fields that line the sides of the river. There were orchards of plums, apricots, cherries, peaches and vast plantings of the famous Idaho potatoes along the river, all which drink up the water of the Salmon River as it runs to join the Columbia.  
 The ocean has moods just as the river with the seasons, varying with the time of day and the temperature of the air that surrounds it. I have been constantly amazed by the ocean’s colors, power and changes of its surface and waves.  I have always had an overpowering sense of what my father called the God Almighty that seems to fill my soul whenever I walk on the shore.  I know that happened today while we walking on the shoreline.
            Once again, why don’t I do it more often?  Work, exhaustion, for sometimes when I get home, I know that if I sit down for a moment I am lost, completely.  There have been days when I just want to go to bed and I do.  I don’t care if it is five thirty or seven o’clock.  My mind shuts down, my eyes refuse to function, my stomach tells me that breakfast in the morning is good enough and I skip dinner as I tumble to bed.  My husband worries enough that there are times that he does work on making me something to eat to encourage me to do so, at those times, I become an automatic thing that lifts morsels of sustenance to my mouth for processing.   
            Back to unexpected events happening in our lives.  I watched the leaning of the corner of our backyard fence during one of our rain and wind storms, I pointed it out to my dear husband who took advantage of a break in between storms to try and prop up the fence with boards pushed against it.  While doing so, he decided to check out the sump pump under the house which did not seem to be running.  After crawling in 8 inches of chilly water, he determined that the sump pump had a great crack in it and we needed a new one.  I helped him by running him a hot tub, getting him a hot cup of tea and letting him know that I was calling around to find a new one.  I located one in Corvallis, an hour’s drive from our home.  While he was soaking in the warmth of the hot water to chase away the chill of his adventure beneath the house, I told my husband that we were driving to the valley to a Home Depot to pick up the sump pump and whatever else he needed.  He did not argue. 
            The next day was a holiday and my husband spent it getting the sump pump out of the box, reading the instructions and planning out his attack.  I went for a lovely hour massage.  He had worked a bit on gluing fittings the night before and while I was gone (he informed me when I got home) he decided to make sure that the pump worked so in the comfort of our kitchen, he placed the pump in a clean bucket of water and turned it on.  He explained to me that the pump had worked, perhaps too well.  While I was suffering under the hands of my  masseuse, my sweet man was busy drying off the ceiling, cupboards, floor and walls of the kitchen where the bursts of water from the sump pump had landed.   I was thankful that I had missed the event and was only present for the telling of the tale.  
            On a cold January day, I stood in the doorway of the garage watching my man strip down to his underwear, shivering when he put on the cold icy wet clothes of pants, sweatshirt, socks and shoes from the day before that he had taken off after crawling under the house in the cold water. I asked why he didn’t put on dry clothes, he answered because he was just going to get them wet again.  After he was dressed, I went back into the house, put on two more sweaters and turned up the heat in sympathy. I am all about sympathy and I was trying my best to be warm while he crept back into the cold water under the house.  I checked on his progress periodically with my hands gripping my hot cup of green tea as I peered toward the access way under the house where the comforting sounds of banging came.  
            After he had installed the new sump pump we both enjoyed watching the water stream into the gutter of our street. We turned to look at the propped up fence, sigh and called our contractor. The highlight of this project was a nifty flashlight that could wear on his head while he worked.  Some people get all the luck.
  Things come in three, right?  As I look back on it all, the warning light coming on in the car was not part of the pack of three. It was the washing machine that was starting to scream when it was spinning that started the ball rolling, followed by the fence being blowing down completely in a heavy rain storm that sported gale force winds and the sump pump that was cracked and had to be replaced so our house would remain dry.  You can look at it all philosophically as the outward manifestation of an internal turmoil in our hearts and minds but I think that you would be a long time looking for an internal source in either my husband or myself as both of us are pretty even minded and are luckily are generally filled with calm and peace. 
            I am not waiting for the next time the wind blows and the fence falls down to gather as much peace and happiness in my heart and mind.  It exists.  Not at the edge of my fingertips, or outside my door but in my heart where the divine spirit of everything dwells without any effort on my part, I just have to be.  


  


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